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The Crippling Cold

I’ve been home for over two hours now and I still haven’t managed to warm up. This will be my first autumn and winter since becoming ill that I have been independently active, as in able to get myself around outside. Today I went to a planning meeting with my writing group, the Chester Writers, as we are doing an event at the Chester Literature Festival on Friday, 14 October (I’ll be reading an extract from my memoir). I had to get into town on my mobility scooter and it was raining hard, and very cold. It seems that October has brought the cold weather with it.

Regrowing your nerves is a strange thing. After half a year of constant pain, I now have heightened sensitivity. Since I’ve come off the morphine, my sensation is returning along with my mental aptitude and feeling much more like “me”. My bed is suddenly incredibly uncomfortable, and it seems that I have greater cold sensitivity. Maybe I’ll become more empathetic too.

By the time I got home, the function in my right hand, which is usually stronger, was much worse than in my left. My grip was bad and I’ve struggled to pick things up which would usually not be a problem to me. I think I may have to have a long hot bath before I can finally warm up! I never really thought about the phrase “the crippling cold” before, but I think that this is a phrase that’s going to have greater meaning for me this year. Time to dig out all my handknitted and cosy items.

My creative writing MA starts today. I’ve chosen creative non-fiction as my primary genre, with fiction as my secondary. I’m going to be focusing on life writing and working on my memoir about my illness and recovery. I hope to blog much more, and will be using it as my notebook for my writing and other thoughts. I’m also experimenting with using dictation software, as typing is not an option for me at the moment. Especially with these cold crippled fingers!